The Secret Report

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Rating Summary

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Background
I already reviewed another horribly drawn webcomic, namely Wormcurse. The art also sucks, but the writing is also wretched as well.

Downfall
This thing always sucked.

Story and Plot
Two young males buy a tiny house on a huge lot for $80.000 (Which currency?) Unsurprisingly, it is very messy inside, and they clean it up. They actually do a wonderful job of it, all in one day! (Can I hire them to do mine?) Then Will, the taller long-haired man does work on his computer, while Jake, the short orange-haired man, goes to bed, but cannot sleep peacefully. uh-oh, Will had the same experience, and it turns out the city sold them the property because all the previous owners had left there after hearing the same noises that bothered our heroes.

Let's take a pause. Presumably they bought the house as both a residence and a workplace. Why would they spend so much on their own house rather than, say, renting an apartment or buying a condominium? And who provided the funds? What are their ages, backgrounds, relationship to one another besides coworkers? Certainly we should know these details since these two people made such a big investment together.

The two play frisbee (I assume), and then Jake (the orange-haired man) has an accident. Jake is okay, but they have to look for their "flywheel" (is this Australia?) in the forested part of their property. Doing so, they make another find. Namely a locked door leading into a tunnel. Jake goes inside and enters a room with a red dragon inside, and Will goes in after him. Will does not freak out like Jake did, and the red dragon assures them that he will not harm them. In fact, the dragon leads our heroes into an elevator. Unfortunately Jake elects to sabotage it, bringing trouble to everybody. Fortunately the trouble is not so serious after all, to the relief of the dragon, whose name is Irioth. Irioth leaves our heroes to explore the dragon city, and Will trusts the dragons while Jake remains pessimistic.

Another dragon named Lemmy arrives and sends our heroes into an ice cream parlor. Our heroes have no money, but they do not need it to get ice cream. Also, the other dragons are being kept away from our heroes to avoid panicking them. Oh, and the dragons are very old beings. Leaving the parlor, Jake notes the huge size of the city-obviously covering a bigger area than their property. Will notes that the dragon society has no poverty or hunger. They both find a hot dog stand and Will asks the proprietor how this society can possibly work. The proprietor talks about how dragon society used to work, and how it is very much different now. Jake becomes impressed by this wonderful dragon society, but they both realize they are entirely at the mercy of the dragons.

They again meet Irioth, and this time he has them [

Art review


There are other webcomics with very bad art, but few that are this level of infantile.

Writing review
The story is about two people who buy an unwanted house with a huge lot, evidently to use as a home and as a remote workplace. Unfortunately all we learn about them is their first names and that one is Irish. It is not long before they find a concealed entrance to what turns out to be a passageway to a secret world of space alien dragons. Since the house is part of a city and not way out from civilization, how did this secret world remain undiscovered by anyone else before our two heroes did? It's not just a big room, but some self-sustaining city. So did our heroes travel to some other dimension or something? Then why would anyone have heard noises from the surface to begin with?

And this city is some sort of idealized community where you can get ice cream and hot dogs without spending money. Where do food and materials come from? For that matter, where does air come from? And some of the dragons wear human-style clothes. If they are isolated from Earth society, why would they mimic it-or for that matter speak English? Willing suspension of disbelief can only go so far.

Author biography
I will let his Twitter page do the talking.

Links
His YouTube channel